“Probably a plagiarized quote” — Some racist dead guy

If you are reading this and you are not me, then I’m sorry your life has led you here. Do not give up hope. There is more to life than this. Go for a walk, smell the roses, be free.

I would compare this blog to me laughing at my own jokes, but it is so much worse than that…this is laughing at my own jokes, writing those jokes down, laughing some more, then logging into my blog and posting those jokes on said blog in order to be able to google my own jokes just to laugh at them later.

You have found my comedic masturbation station. This is my Self-Bone Joke Throne. And, yes, to answer the question that my zero followers are asking, I did laugh at Self-Bone Joke Throne. Maybe because it looks so symmetrical when you write it down. Maybe because it’s about touching my penis.

If you couldn’t already tell, this blog is the product of very little effort. To be honest, I was hoping to get Toilet Town as my domain name (doesn’t it just roll off the tongue?), but I settled for Flush Factory since apparently Toilet Town is only available for bloggers who pay to be here. By the way who pays to have a blog? I will carry my .wordpress.com with my head held high and my savings account intact.

If you decide to keep reading it’s your own damn fault.

Flush your mistakes away
The original Flush Factory. Right: boy who didn’t measure his drinks. Left: other boy (me) with no moral compass. Courtesy of Getty Images.

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